Have you heard the one about the Snake, the Whale, the Sailfish, and the Monk Seal?!
While that sounds like the beginning of yet another really bad "walked into a bar" joke...it's not!!! Over the past few days I've come across more Crazy but True headlines involving animals and they've all been more wild than the previous.
Lets start with this one:
Out of a horror movie’: Pennsylvania officer shoots snake around man’s neck
Apparently this Pennsylvania man's "pet snake", which happened to be 15ft long finally got fed up with his cramped living conditions and decided to show his human who's boss!
Thank God these police officers showed up when they did, as the snake had the mid section of its body coiled around his owners neck and the man was in full cardiac arrest (he's only 28). The officers said that because the snakes head was far enough away from the man they were able to take a shot which wounded the snake enough that it released its grip and slithered away, eventually "expiring".
The human was taken to the hospital, but his condition is unknown. The cops are clearly the MVP's in this situation.
Now, as a person who grew up in Massachusetts and has been on her fair share of "whale watches" this next headline and video not only caught my attention but also blew my mind:le lands on boat off Massachusetts coast in ‘insane’ moment caught on video
Video Shows Whale Breaching Off Mass. Coast, Landing on Boat: ‘It Was Insane!'
Check it out...
ale lands on boat off Massachusetts coast in ‘insane’ moment
According to witnesses who've been frequenting this particular inlet off White-Horse beach in Plymouth Ma for years, this boat just happened to be in the wrong place at the right time. They said they've seen whales...sure...but never have they seen a whale do a full breach, 10ft out of the water, and land on the bow of boat.
Thankfully the whale was fine as were all of the people onboard the 19ft vessel, which was shockingly still seaworthy after the incident and returned to the boat ramp under its own power with some minor damage done to its bow but nothing too serious.
The harbor master said that due to an abundance of bait fish in the area not only are there tons of boats and people fishing, but its also attracted the whales into the area to feed so he has issued a warning reminding all boaters to try to keep at least 100ft distance between themselves and the whales at all times.
Safe to say, these folks have a "Whale" of a Tale to tell friends, family, and future generations...*pun most definitely intended*!
You'd think after those two epic headlines...there can't be anything to top that...WRONG!!!
Here's another one....
A sailfish leaped out of the sea and stabbed a woman in the groin
Photo: Getty Images
So there's no video of this particular incident, which occurred over the weekend off the coast of Stuart Florida aka the self-proclaimed "Sailfish Capital of the World".
According to reports, Katherine Perkings, 73 and from Arnold, MD., was stabbed in the groin by a sailfish. Perkins was out boating with friends, who hooked the sailfish, which the two men estimate weighed about 100lbs. As they tried to reel it in the fish began to charge at the boat and then leaped out of the water, stabbing the woman who was just minding her own business. The men immediately called for help and Katherine was airlifted to a hospital after the boat returned to shore.
All I can say is...
And Last but Not Least...there's THIS:
Hawaiian Monk Seal named Rocky attacks swimmer at Kaimana Beach
wait 'til you see the video...
Now in this particular situation I am 1000% team Rocky the Monk Seal!!!
1st of all there were signs posted on the beach alerting swimmers and beach-goers alike that there were monk seals present & nursing in the water and to steer clear as they are one of the MOST endangered species of Seals.
ALSO...Rocky is well known to locals and as she made very clear in the video...this is HER house and she will protect her PUPs!!!
Although...I kind of feel like the pup might've brought a little extra whoop-ass that ladies way when he started playing with her. Momma definitely ain't have time for the foolishness.
Safe to say Rocky signed, SEALED, and delivered a "warning" that will not soon be forgotten!!! Bears ain't the only protective mommas in the Wild...believe that!!!
Can't lie...I'm a little concerned! If the animals of the world ever decide to posse up and take back their planet...